Personalized Funny Retired Horse With Coffee I'm Retired I Don't Have To Humor Gift Tote Bag. This laugh-out-loud design features a goofy cartoon horse relaxing with a steaming cup of coffee and the perfectly relatable retirement motto: "I'm Retired - I Don't Have To, I Don't Want To, You Can't Make Me." A hilarious and spot-on gift for anyone celebrating retirement or embracing the retired life. Whether you're shopping for a horse lover, a coffee addict, or a newly retired friend or family member, this witty design says it all with humor and charm. Light Weight 6oz 100% Cotton Tote Bag. 14.5"W x 15.5"H, handles are 20" in length.